More Musings

There are plenty of thigns to write about, but I'm just too lazy today. Instead, I present the following ideas and questions for your consideration.

1) I want to market a sleeveless snuggie: Direct it to white trash, mainly. Pattern/colors like lumberjack plaid, denim, orange hunting vest, camoflauge, Stars n Bars, etc.

2) Prince's "Purple and Gold" might be the worst fight song ever. But for those of you musically inclined, imagine that tune sped up 30% and put to a marching band. Might go from worst fight song ever to one of the best. Hidden genius right there.

3) American Idol auditions could be turned into a series on their own. Get the worst of the worst/best of the best and let them fight it out tournament style for a cash prize.

4) Is it more of a sin for a Patriot fan to route for the Jets or the Colts? Division rival or Manning? I wonder if this is how China felt during the later years of the Cold War betwen the US and Russia.

5) Why are there so many Jews in Freemasonry? Nothing anti-Semetic here, but the belief system of Judaism should preclude this, even though a lot of Masonic ritual is founded from various Jewish beliefs.

6) Who will the media support in the Super Bowl? Manning is their boy, but the Saints underdog/Katrina stories are the stuff sportscaster wet dreams are made of.

7) If they were real, who would be the most annoying comic strip to have to live with? Think about this: Most comics are filled with exceptionally annoying people and even the ones who are funny would be painful to live with. I'd die in a day if I had to live with Bill Keane's "Family Circus" and god help me if I was in a room with Kathy. Garfield, as unfunny as it is, might actually be better to live with. Tons of food, a neurotic guy to shit on, and a lovable dog.

8) Is "Who Dat?" the worst sports fan saying since "Cowboy Up"? Or one of the best since "We are Family"? Possibly both.

9) What would have happened if that quake struck Cuba and not Haiti? Talk about a load of fun.

10) Why is "Midget" offenseive to little people? I understand it's a specific form of dwarfism and doesn't describe every little person, but it's not derogatory. It's not like we're calling them Stool Users, Meter-Niggers, or Puddle Swimmers.

11) When will it become cool to be a guy and a fan of Leonardo DiCaprio. What was the last movie that he was bad in? Think about it, then answer me that.

12) Will fans of the original Star Trek become spiteful of people who now like Trek due to the new movie? It seems like the same as becoming a fan of classic football after watching the XFL.

13) Andre Dawson is going into the Baseball Hall of Fame this summer as an Expo, despite wanting to go in as a Cub. Fuck Wade Boggs for this one. His musing (even if it was sarcastic) about wanting to go into the HOF as a Tampa Bay Devil Ray is one of the things that caused the Hall of Fame to change the rules allowing players to chose what cap they wear on their plaque. When a player like Dawson waits 10+ years to get into the Hall, let him pick his own cap, so long as it's not clearly a bullshit political maneuver.

14) Afternoon tea is a tragically lost custom. Light snack with tea would do so much better than the standard 3-meal breakdown of American eats.

15) Fuck the History Channel for letting Larry the Cable Guy have a show on the network. History Channel. Larry the Cable Guy. Let that sink in.

That'll do for now.