Below is an article from a blog by Charlie Stross. In short, it sums up an old scientific theory about the relative uninhabitable nature of the Earth. While it's been discussed in the past by many writers, Stross puts this in a very different light, making it easy to understand and very interesting to read.
http://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2009/10/how_habitable_is_the_earth.html
What I find most interesting about this article is that in many ways this theory can be used by believers to insist upon the existance of a supreme being ("It had to be God's plan, it's too big of a coincidence not to be.") or by non-believers to praise the randomness of evolution and the cosmic dice throw. As someone who is basically agnostic, with a leaning towards some sort of supreme architect of the universe, whether it is "God" or the governing laws of phyics, I'm left in sheer amazement of the evolution of the human machine.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Reviewing "The Inferno"
While it might be exceptionally pretentious to assume anyone wishes to read the review of a 700 year old book that has been broken down time and time again, I'll risk pretention and make a quick comment on Dante's epic poem.
So powerful was this poem that the Christian vision of hell was essentially reworked to coincide with the imagery in Dante's work. Interestingly, "The Inferno" was meant as much of a commentary on the political state of Florence spliced with references to pagan myths and historical figures. In actually, I have found nothing "Christian" about this vision, lacking any of the so called Christian virtues. Charity, compassion, sympathy, forgiveness; these are almost entirely lacking.
What is so interesting about this, is that the imagery was so vivid, so frightening, and so cleverly written, that the descriptions of hellish punishments for sinners became a tool for the Church to use frighten its followers. Of course, this is nothing new to the fourteenth century, as the Christian institution has often used an assortment of past traditions and powerful imagery to achieve its religious and political objectives.
In many ways, I almost find it unfortunate that the Christain view of hell is little more than a work of fiction that has been taken as a point of faith. Snark aside, this seems the modern day equivalent of using the next apocolyptic film as a true vision of the future. On the other hand, the Inferno is so enjoyable and unlike anything every written (save Milton's "Paradise Lost") that Christianity could have done far worse.
So powerful was this poem that the Christian vision of hell was essentially reworked to coincide with the imagery in Dante's work. Interestingly, "The Inferno" was meant as much of a commentary on the political state of Florence spliced with references to pagan myths and historical figures. In actually, I have found nothing "Christian" about this vision, lacking any of the so called Christian virtues. Charity, compassion, sympathy, forgiveness; these are almost entirely lacking.
What is so interesting about this, is that the imagery was so vivid, so frightening, and so cleverly written, that the descriptions of hellish punishments for sinners became a tool for the Church to use frighten its followers. Of course, this is nothing new to the fourteenth century, as the Christian institution has often used an assortment of past traditions and powerful imagery to achieve its religious and political objectives.
In many ways, I almost find it unfortunate that the Christain view of hell is little more than a work of fiction that has been taken as a point of faith. Snark aside, this seems the modern day equivalent of using the next apocolyptic film as a true vision of the future. On the other hand, the Inferno is so enjoyable and unlike anything every written (save Milton's "Paradise Lost") that Christianity could have done far worse.
Book Excerpt
Untitled Star Trek Project
For the last two and a half years, I have been developing a novel-length story in the Star Trek universe. Taking place approximately three years after Star Trek: Nemesis, the begining of the book will be set in mid-2831, in the wake of a devastationg and near-apocalyptic invasion of the Federation, in which much of society is forced to deal with life in a universe recovering from unthinkable disaster.
Following the published works of the expanded universe, the premise deals with a young scientist and Starfleet officer struggling to come to terms with the often tenuous relationship between peacetime exploration and the military. Analyzing the effects of military institution and its dichotomy with civilian life, the project is meant to reflect upon historical events and merge them with the world of Star Trek.
The exerpt below, does not deal directly with the above theme, but rather serves as a brief introduction to John Chamberlain, an experienced captain and secondary protagonist. Chamberlain will come to represent the military complex within Starfleet, an organization that must balance its peaceful functions with its more martial ones. His name and basic character, are directly inspired and draw many comparisons to Joshua L. Chamberlain, Civil War hero and Maine statesman (and possible distant ancestor). In the book, Chamberlain will play commanding officer and friendly authority figure to Gavin Malkar, the project's protagonist, who I will introduce later.
U.S.S. Grayson
Indri VIII
Captain John Chamberlain squinted to read the words flashing across vibrating data terminal in front of him. Setting down his cup of coffee, which proceeded to splash on the rattling desk, he let out a barely audible sigh and gripped the desk monitor, unsuccessfully trying to steady the device. Letting his eyes drift off the monitor and scanning the small, sterile ready room, Chamberlain could not help but notice the barrenness of his surroundings. The plain antimony walls, harsh lighting, and well-worn black desk in front of him, did every bit as much to betray the age of his temporary command, as did the shaking of the room around him. At over a century old, the U.S.S. Grayson was just one of hundreds of mothballed ships that had been brought into service in the wake of the disastrous Borg invasion earlier in the year. Having served in Starfleet for over three decades, the fifty-one year old Chamberlain was no stranger to being aboard starships old and new, but the less than rhythmic vibrations of the ship's warp deceleration proved to be slightly jarring. Still, everything that has happened these last few months has been jarring, Chamberlain thought.
Despite the slightly bumpy deceleration, it was only the sharp chime of the ship's intercom that broke Captain Chamberlain of his reverie.
Velazquez to the Captain, a female voice chirped through the speaker.
“Go ahead, Lieutenant.”
Sir, we've come out of warp in the Indri system. We're due to make orbit in just under four minutes, but we've picked up something unusual on the ship's sensors.
“Unusual?” Chamberlain replied, taking a small sip of his coffee.
Yes, sir. For a fraction of a second, short-range sensors seemed to indicate a small source of vertiron particles and rather high neutrino emissions.
“Vertirons and neutrinos,” the Captain's voice showing a hint of intrigue, “are you sure?”
Yes, Captain. We couldn't get a fix on the exact source, but the computer registered a definite reading.
“Well neutrinos could indicate the presence of a cloak,” Chamberlain said, in a tone indicating absent conjecture rather than any certainty.
Lieutenant Wallace suggested that too. From what we can tell, the source was far to small to be a cloaked ship. There doesn't appear to be any immediate threat.
“Well, Velazquez,” Chamberlain replied, lightly dismissive, “with the age and condition of these sensors, you could very well be chasing ghosts. We can always double back and scan the area after we've unloaded the cargo, but for now, let's proceed to our scheduled rendezvous. I'll be on the bridge in a moment. Chamberlain out.”
Tapping off the data terminal and taking one more sip of coffee, Chamberlain set down the cup once more on the now-still desk. Seeing his reflection in the black screen of the blank monitor, he noticed the small creases that had subtly began to form on the sides his eyes over, betraying his own advancing age. This betrayal was further exacerbated by the sprinkling of gray that had just recently begun to appear in his sandy-brown mustache; a bushy horseshoe-shaped bit of facial hair that hung over his upper lip and down the sides of his mouth. This walrus-like mustache distinguished him every bit as much as the slightly long hair that hung just past the tops of his ears, making the captain seem like somewhat of an anachronism, fit more to commanding a cavalry brigade than a starship. Hair that was also, Chamberlain admitted to himself as he peered at his reflection, starting to show the slightest bit of gray in the temples.
His heavy brow furrowing, Chamberlain stood up and tugged at his black uniform shirt, then adjusted his red collar slightly, making sure to be the perfect image of order when he appeared on the Grayson's bridge. To his credit, Chamberlain had a very regal bearing, despite his somewhat unusual look. Having once been described by a colleague as appearing firm and but not too rigid, every detail of his person was properly seen to. Adding to this image was a somewhat austere, though quite thoughtful look, that seemed to be permanently affixed to the captain's face. As he made his way out the ready room door and onto the bridge, Chamberlain hoped that this image would show to his new, albeit temporary, crew.
Note: Avid Star Trek fans will take note of the ship, "U.S.S. Grayson," named for character Amanda Grayson, wife of Sarek of Vulcan. Described by A.C. Crispin in her 1994 novel Sarek, the ship's namesake was said to be a humanitarian and noted civilian scientist. As a result, I found it fitting to name a relief ship.
For the last two and a half years, I have been developing a novel-length story in the Star Trek universe. Taking place approximately three years after Star Trek: Nemesis, the begining of the book will be set in mid-2831, in the wake of a devastationg and near-apocalyptic invasion of the Federation, in which much of society is forced to deal with life in a universe recovering from unthinkable disaster.
Following the published works of the expanded universe, the premise deals with a young scientist and Starfleet officer struggling to come to terms with the often tenuous relationship between peacetime exploration and the military. Analyzing the effects of military institution and its dichotomy with civilian life, the project is meant to reflect upon historical events and merge them with the world of Star Trek.
The exerpt below, does not deal directly with the above theme, but rather serves as a brief introduction to John Chamberlain, an experienced captain and secondary protagonist. Chamberlain will come to represent the military complex within Starfleet, an organization that must balance its peaceful functions with its more martial ones. His name and basic character, are directly inspired and draw many comparisons to Joshua L. Chamberlain, Civil War hero and Maine statesman (and possible distant ancestor). In the book, Chamberlain will play commanding officer and friendly authority figure to Gavin Malkar, the project's protagonist, who I will introduce later.
U.S.S. Grayson
Indri VIII
Captain John Chamberlain squinted to read the words flashing across vibrating data terminal in front of him. Setting down his cup of coffee, which proceeded to splash on the rattling desk, he let out a barely audible sigh and gripped the desk monitor, unsuccessfully trying to steady the device. Letting his eyes drift off the monitor and scanning the small, sterile ready room, Chamberlain could not help but notice the barrenness of his surroundings. The plain antimony walls, harsh lighting, and well-worn black desk in front of him, did every bit as much to betray the age of his temporary command, as did the shaking of the room around him. At over a century old, the U.S.S. Grayson was just one of hundreds of mothballed ships that had been brought into service in the wake of the disastrous Borg invasion earlier in the year. Having served in Starfleet for over three decades, the fifty-one year old Chamberlain was no stranger to being aboard starships old and new, but the less than rhythmic vibrations of the ship's warp deceleration proved to be slightly jarring. Still, everything that has happened these last few months has been jarring, Chamberlain thought.
Despite the slightly bumpy deceleration, it was only the sharp chime of the ship's intercom that broke Captain Chamberlain of his reverie.
Velazquez to the Captain, a female voice chirped through the speaker.
“Go ahead, Lieutenant.”
Sir, we've come out of warp in the Indri system. We're due to make orbit in just under four minutes, but we've picked up something unusual on the ship's sensors.
“Unusual?” Chamberlain replied, taking a small sip of his coffee.
Yes, sir. For a fraction of a second, short-range sensors seemed to indicate a small source of vertiron particles and rather high neutrino emissions.
“Vertirons and neutrinos,” the Captain's voice showing a hint of intrigue, “are you sure?”
Yes, Captain. We couldn't get a fix on the exact source, but the computer registered a definite reading.
“Well neutrinos could indicate the presence of a cloak,” Chamberlain said, in a tone indicating absent conjecture rather than any certainty.
Lieutenant Wallace suggested that too. From what we can tell, the source was far to small to be a cloaked ship. There doesn't appear to be any immediate threat.
“Well, Velazquez,” Chamberlain replied, lightly dismissive, “with the age and condition of these sensors, you could very well be chasing ghosts. We can always double back and scan the area after we've unloaded the cargo, but for now, let's proceed to our scheduled rendezvous. I'll be on the bridge in a moment. Chamberlain out.”
Tapping off the data terminal and taking one more sip of coffee, Chamberlain set down the cup once more on the now-still desk. Seeing his reflection in the black screen of the blank monitor, he noticed the small creases that had subtly began to form on the sides his eyes over, betraying his own advancing age. This betrayal was further exacerbated by the sprinkling of gray that had just recently begun to appear in his sandy-brown mustache; a bushy horseshoe-shaped bit of facial hair that hung over his upper lip and down the sides of his mouth. This walrus-like mustache distinguished him every bit as much as the slightly long hair that hung just past the tops of his ears, making the captain seem like somewhat of an anachronism, fit more to commanding a cavalry brigade than a starship. Hair that was also, Chamberlain admitted to himself as he peered at his reflection, starting to show the slightest bit of gray in the temples.
His heavy brow furrowing, Chamberlain stood up and tugged at his black uniform shirt, then adjusted his red collar slightly, making sure to be the perfect image of order when he appeared on the Grayson's bridge. To his credit, Chamberlain had a very regal bearing, despite his somewhat unusual look. Having once been described by a colleague as appearing firm and but not too rigid, every detail of his person was properly seen to. Adding to this image was a somewhat austere, though quite thoughtful look, that seemed to be permanently affixed to the captain's face. As he made his way out the ready room door and onto the bridge, Chamberlain hoped that this image would show to his new, albeit temporary, crew.
Note: Avid Star Trek fans will take note of the ship, "U.S.S. Grayson," named for character Amanda Grayson, wife of Sarek of Vulcan. Described by A.C. Crispin in her 1994 novel Sarek, the ship's namesake was said to be a humanitarian and noted civilian scientist. As a result, I found it fitting to name a relief ship.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Random Musings 2: Eclectic Bugaloo
Here's a few Top 7 lists to chew on. Why 7? It's a biblical number. It's more decisive than 5. It's completely arbitrary, just like the lists. These are in no particular order
Top 7 Awesome Smells
1) Libraries: C'mon, there's something awesome about the smell of musty paper and rows upon rows of books.
2) Playdough: Try to contest this one
3) Pumpkin Spice Donut: See Also: Pumpkin Spice Beer, Pumpkin Spice Anything
4) Fresh Basil (still on plant): Mix with lemon for orgasmic scent
5) Beer mash: Before it's beer, it's a mushy brown mash of grains and boiling water that smells like a cross between bread and awesome.
6) Ice Hockey Rink: Seriously, go smell it. I don't know what the chemical is, but it's amazing.
7) New York City: Olfactory Overload
Top 7 Books that NEED to be written (and some that could never be)
1) Comprehensive History of the Eisenhower Interstate System: You could circle the world dozens of times with the pavement laid down in the 1950's and 1960's. It has to be worth a read.
2) Comprehensive History of the NYC Subway System: 700 miles of track under granite, swamp, and even river. The ultimate engineering marvel of the world.
3) Presidents and Polygraphs: Ask US Presidents questions while hooked up to a Polygraph. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Enjoy.
4) A Muslim's View of the Crusades: Go back in time, kidnap a Muslim leader during the invasions, let him write an autobiography.
5) Christ - The Autobiography: Would the holes in his hands keep him from properly holding a pen?
6) The History of Comfort Foods: The story behind who came up with foods like PB&J and Mac n Cheese. Seriously, just think about the combinations of food we eat.
7) The List Book: A book listing the greatest lists of all time. Who doesn't like lists? Communists, that' who.
Top 7 Candies Old People Like
1) Black Licorice: It's like beer. You can't enjoy it under a certain age.
2) Worther's Original: Awesomeness comes in a coffee flavored hunk of sugar.
3) Sugar-Free Lifesavers: Try the mixed berry ones.
4) After Dinner Mints: Those weird chalky mints you get at restaurants and grandparents houses have some great value
5) NECCO Wafers: Addictive despite how horrible they are
6) Spice Drops: The look of disappointment when a little kid thinks he's getting fruity candy and bites into a purple spice drop that tastes like licorice and mint makes these worthwhile.
7) Butterscotch Candies: If you haven't gotten and enjoyed one of these from someone over 50 you either don't have grandparents or don't hang out with pedophiles.
Top 7 Flags of the World
1) Britain' Union Jack: Even the French like this.
2) Libya: These fuckers were too lazy to actually design something, so they hung a plain green sheet.
3) Macedonia: Yellow sun with a red background sorta like a twisted old Japanese rising sun. Awesomeness.
4) Bhutan: Anyone who can get a dragon on their flag is okay by me.
5) Nazi Germany: Yeah, fuck the Nazi's and everything they did. And fuck them for ruining what was an awesome logo.
6) Sri Lanka: What's better than a dragon than a lion-dragon thingy holding a knife! Bonus points for the crazy colors.
7) Nepal: Apparently the rectangular fabric store was closed the day it was designed.
Top 7 Never-Printed Family Circus Plots
1) The one where Jeffy gets kidnapped by the creepy neighbor.
2) The one where Bill beats Thelma and the kids for ruining his life.
3) The one where Dolly accidentally puts the car in reverse, running over the family dog.
4) The one where the kids age.
5) The one that shows a minority.
6) The one where Thelma admits that P.J. was a failed abortion.
7) The one that's actually funny.
Top 7 Overrated Rock Bands
1) Aerosmith: I don't want to walk this way or that.
2) The Doors: Die Jim Morrison. Well, at least you did that right.
3) U2: Bono's toned it back a bit in recent years, but have they really done much good since the 1980's?
4) Nirvana: Everyone (including me) has had a Nirvana phase. Some great stuff, but how many shit bands did they influence? And ask yourself this: If Cobain hadn't died, how many more albums could he do that sounded like they did without people getting sick of them.
5) Pink Floyd: Sorry, but 3 great albums don't excuse all the crap.
6) The Eagles: A few great hits, a LOT of crap.
7) Van Halen: How they ever got as popular as they did will never cease to amaze.
Top 7 Shows That Were Cancelled Too Soon
1) Firefly
2) Animaniacs
3) Andy Richter Controls the Universe
4) The Chevy Chase Show: A week, guys, really?!
5) Enterprise: It was just getting good.
6) Reading Rainbow: Fuck you, illiterate youth!
7) Eek the Cat: Meet Halley, Acorn, Steven Junior, Gunther, and my lovely wife, SUUUUUZAN
Top 7 Awesome Smells
1) Libraries: C'mon, there's something awesome about the smell of musty paper and rows upon rows of books.
2) Playdough: Try to contest this one
3) Pumpkin Spice Donut: See Also: Pumpkin Spice Beer, Pumpkin Spice Anything
4) Fresh Basil (still on plant): Mix with lemon for orgasmic scent
5) Beer mash: Before it's beer, it's a mushy brown mash of grains and boiling water that smells like a cross between bread and awesome.
6) Ice Hockey Rink: Seriously, go smell it. I don't know what the chemical is, but it's amazing.
7) New York City: Olfactory Overload
Top 7 Books that NEED to be written (and some that could never be)
1) Comprehensive History of the Eisenhower Interstate System: You could circle the world dozens of times with the pavement laid down in the 1950's and 1960's. It has to be worth a read.
2) Comprehensive History of the NYC Subway System: 700 miles of track under granite, swamp, and even river. The ultimate engineering marvel of the world.
3) Presidents and Polygraphs: Ask US Presidents questions while hooked up to a Polygraph. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Enjoy.
4) A Muslim's View of the Crusades: Go back in time, kidnap a Muslim leader during the invasions, let him write an autobiography.
5) Christ - The Autobiography: Would the holes in his hands keep him from properly holding a pen?
6) The History of Comfort Foods: The story behind who came up with foods like PB&J and Mac n Cheese. Seriously, just think about the combinations of food we eat.
7) The List Book: A book listing the greatest lists of all time. Who doesn't like lists? Communists, that' who.
Top 7 Candies Old People Like
1) Black Licorice: It's like beer. You can't enjoy it under a certain age.
2) Worther's Original: Awesomeness comes in a coffee flavored hunk of sugar.
3) Sugar-Free Lifesavers: Try the mixed berry ones.
4) After Dinner Mints: Those weird chalky mints you get at restaurants and grandparents houses have some great value
5) NECCO Wafers: Addictive despite how horrible they are
6) Spice Drops: The look of disappointment when a little kid thinks he's getting fruity candy and bites into a purple spice drop that tastes like licorice and mint makes these worthwhile.
7) Butterscotch Candies: If you haven't gotten and enjoyed one of these from someone over 50 you either don't have grandparents or don't hang out with pedophiles.
Top 7 Flags of the World
1) Britain' Union Jack: Even the French like this.
2) Libya: These fuckers were too lazy to actually design something, so they hung a plain green sheet.
3) Macedonia: Yellow sun with a red background sorta like a twisted old Japanese rising sun. Awesomeness.
4) Bhutan: Anyone who can get a dragon on their flag is okay by me.
5) Nazi Germany: Yeah, fuck the Nazi's and everything they did. And fuck them for ruining what was an awesome logo.
6) Sri Lanka: What's better than a dragon than a lion-dragon thingy holding a knife! Bonus points for the crazy colors.
7) Nepal: Apparently the rectangular fabric store was closed the day it was designed.
Top 7 Never-Printed Family Circus Plots
1) The one where Jeffy gets kidnapped by the creepy neighbor.
2) The one where Bill beats Thelma and the kids for ruining his life.
3) The one where Dolly accidentally puts the car in reverse, running over the family dog.
4) The one where the kids age.
5) The one that shows a minority.
6) The one where Thelma admits that P.J. was a failed abortion.
7) The one that's actually funny.
Top 7 Overrated Rock Bands
1) Aerosmith: I don't want to walk this way or that.
2) The Doors: Die Jim Morrison. Well, at least you did that right.
3) U2: Bono's toned it back a bit in recent years, but have they really done much good since the 1980's?
4) Nirvana: Everyone (including me) has had a Nirvana phase. Some great stuff, but how many shit bands did they influence? And ask yourself this: If Cobain hadn't died, how many more albums could he do that sounded like they did without people getting sick of them.
5) Pink Floyd: Sorry, but 3 great albums don't excuse all the crap.
6) The Eagles: A few great hits, a LOT of crap.
7) Van Halen: How they ever got as popular as they did will never cease to amaze.
Top 7 Shows That Were Cancelled Too Soon
1) Firefly
2) Animaniacs
3) Andy Richter Controls the Universe
4) The Chevy Chase Show: A week, guys, really?!
5) Enterprise: It was just getting good.
6) Reading Rainbow: Fuck you, illiterate youth!
7) Eek the Cat: Meet Halley, Acorn, Steven Junior, Gunther, and my lovely wife, SUUUUUZAN
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Musings of No Particular Importance
As an opinionated know-it-all, I am never short of things to discuss, which brings me to the following things that have been on my mind lately. They very in intensity and seriousness, mostly being utterly meaningless. In no particular order, here are my week's thoughts.
The NFL has hit a gold mine this season with the huge number of high-profile quarterbacks. I don't care much about NFL, but even I am tuning in.
House, M.D. has been incredible television for the start of the season. How they manage to keep the show watchable with the same diagnostic premises every week is a miracle of nature.
For reasons that I'm uncertain of, I've enjoyed the hell out of Flash Forward, despite it being a completely ridiculous premise.
My uncle Scott was generous enough to take me to the Red Sox game last Tuesday, which despite the loss, was a great time and a great game. He's always been good to me, but one-on-one, he's awesome.
The NYC subway system and the US Eisenhower interstate system are the two greatest achievements of mankind next to buffalo wings and ,lesbian porn.
The UConn library needs to let UConn alumni check out books. I could spend days in there reading history books, like I did when I was pledging. Of course, my GPA sucked but I knew lots about Freemasons and the Roman Army.
"Win" and "Fail" are so overused, but are the best slang to describe a positive and negative in a while. It certainly beats "SCORE!" Fuck you girl in Mrs. Cirillo's Writing and the Media Class who said that after anything even remotely good happened. "You got a C+ on your test." "SCORE!" "Hey, the lunch lady gave me an extra meatball. SCORE!" "Wow, the Bruins just put the puck in the net. SCORE!"
I shall be attending the Army vs. Vanderbilt football game on 10/10 with AHF and the folks. West Point is truly my favorite place in the East Coast to be. A certain ex-girlfriend's vagina would have been number one, but she's not in the East Coast anymore, and if memory serves, most men have had a harder time getting into West Point.
Yankees/Sox ALCS? Likely, but I honestly just don't care this year that much. Bigger things to worry about.
Hockey season has started, and I had no idea until 3 days in. It says something about that sport.
Why does Notre Dame still have a fan following?
Laws need to be changed to protect teachers in this country. No comment about my particular case, but I've been reading cases of teachers being blackballed out of the progression for doing nothing.
Does anyone know a good publisher or someone who I can get to knock on Pocket's door?
I've been painting Marty the Zebra from Madagascar for Emily. Expect a finish pic shortly.
I don't like following politics, but for a guy who ran on a centrist platform, Obama's about as Left as you can get without having your dick in a tree. This isn't wholly a bad thing, but his alienation of the Republican party could come back to bite him in the ass. Moreover, if it leads to a Republican in the White House before his healthcare plan has come to fruition, it could be 4 or 8 years of work wasted. Slightly scary. Nonetheless, he seems genuinely likeable, which is sifferent than the last guy.
WWE writing is really stagnant lately.
My fraternity brother Wilpat is being married in Madrid on November 28th. Sadly I'll be unable to attend, but wish him and Deb the best of luck.
I'll have more later, but here are some topics to get anyone reading this thinking.
B.Mo.
The NFL has hit a gold mine this season with the huge number of high-profile quarterbacks. I don't care much about NFL, but even I am tuning in.
House, M.D. has been incredible television for the start of the season. How they manage to keep the show watchable with the same diagnostic premises every week is a miracle of nature.
For reasons that I'm uncertain of, I've enjoyed the hell out of Flash Forward, despite it being a completely ridiculous premise.
My uncle Scott was generous enough to take me to the Red Sox game last Tuesday, which despite the loss, was a great time and a great game. He's always been good to me, but one-on-one, he's awesome.
The NYC subway system and the US Eisenhower interstate system are the two greatest achievements of mankind next to buffalo wings and ,lesbian porn.
The UConn library needs to let UConn alumni check out books. I could spend days in there reading history books, like I did when I was pledging. Of course, my GPA sucked but I knew lots about Freemasons and the Roman Army.
"Win" and "Fail" are so overused, but are the best slang to describe a positive and negative in a while. It certainly beats "SCORE!" Fuck you girl in Mrs. Cirillo's Writing and the Media Class who said that after anything even remotely good happened. "You got a C+ on your test." "SCORE!" "Hey, the lunch lady gave me an extra meatball. SCORE!" "Wow, the Bruins just put the puck in the net. SCORE!"
I shall be attending the Army vs. Vanderbilt football game on 10/10 with AHF and the folks. West Point is truly my favorite place in the East Coast to be. A certain ex-girlfriend's vagina would have been number one, but she's not in the East Coast anymore, and if memory serves, most men have had a harder time getting into West Point.
Yankees/Sox ALCS? Likely, but I honestly just don't care this year that much. Bigger things to worry about.
Hockey season has started, and I had no idea until 3 days in. It says something about that sport.
Why does Notre Dame still have a fan following?
Laws need to be changed to protect teachers in this country. No comment about my particular case, but I've been reading cases of teachers being blackballed out of the progression for doing nothing.
Does anyone know a good publisher or someone who I can get to knock on Pocket's door?
I've been painting Marty the Zebra from Madagascar for Emily. Expect a finish pic shortly.
I don't like following politics, but for a guy who ran on a centrist platform, Obama's about as Left as you can get without having your dick in a tree. This isn't wholly a bad thing, but his alienation of the Republican party could come back to bite him in the ass. Moreover, if it leads to a Republican in the White House before his healthcare plan has come to fruition, it could be 4 or 8 years of work wasted. Slightly scary. Nonetheless, he seems genuinely likeable, which is sifferent than the last guy.
WWE writing is really stagnant lately.
My fraternity brother Wilpat is being married in Madrid on November 28th. Sadly I'll be unable to attend, but wish him and Deb the best of luck.
I'll have more later, but here are some topics to get anyone reading this thinking.
B.Mo.
Labels:
Army Black Knights,
Art,
Boston Red Sox,
Professional Wrestling,
Sports,
Teaching
Monday, September 28, 2009
Life as Art: The Graph
So while reflecting on my life (I do a lot of that these days), I had this interesting idea for an abstract art project. Graph out, on some sort of 3-dimensional medium, (I’m thinking dowels, string, or something similar) the high and low points of one’s life. The X-Axis would represent time, the Y-Axis the level of happiness of the memory. The Z-Axis would be filled with a variety of materials, graphing things like financial security, memories of world events, love interests, etc. In theory, every person would show a very different graph, but I’d guess that certain parts would coincide. However, it would be as much about the expression of one’s life in an artistic graph than it would be about a true psychological or sociological study. Stay tuned, I might work on this.
Monday, September 21, 2009
New York City Craft Beer Week
Quality Beer Weekend
I spent the past weekend in New York City, and while I could take pages describing the museums, the copious amount of food, the amazing fashion, or y time with friends, I really just want to get out some advertising for some incredible bars and brewers.
Sepember 11th-20th marks Craft Beer Week in NYC, with hundreds of different craft brews being sold at 82 bars across the city in 4 boroughs. Some of the top beer bars in the city, including House of Brews on West 51st street and Blind Tiger down in the Greenwich Villiage area (home to the best grilled cheese I have ever tasted).
The highlight of the experience, however, was Rattle 'N' Hum Bar http://www.rattlenhumbarnyc.com/ on East 33rd Street in Manhattan. Hosting "Brewers Nights" for 9 straight nights, I was fortunate enough to be there both Friday and Saturday before I left, getting to meet the brewmasters from Ommegang, Allagash, and Ithica breweries.
Before I heap praise onto one of those breweries specifically, I must comment on the bar itself: A dark place, with a long old-fashioned bar with about 30 taps on the back wall. Crowded, with just a few tables, the remarkable part of the bar was its huge selection of cask beers. Uncarbonated, stored and aged at room temperature, and poured only through gravity, cask beers tend to come few and far between at most bars. A good beer bar will have 3 or 4 cask selections. Due to beer week, however, there were close to 30 casks, ranging from belgian pale ales, sour beers, to a remarkable Stone Smoked Porter with Vanilla.
After arriving on Friday with Madison and sampling some of the casks (as well as the Obammegang brew from Ommegang), my excitement turned to the arrival of the brewers. Hearing me ask about their whereabouts to a waitress, Patrick, slightly-brogued owner of the bar, introduced himself and asked me to follow him. I was quickly whisked away and introduced to Rob Todd, brewmaster of Allagash Brewing Company http://www.allagash.com/ in Maine. The ensuing conversation consisted mostly of his experiences with BeerSchool.com, the value of preserving recipe secrets, and the potential for a Flanders Red Ale or other sour beer in the collection.
Immediately after, we were joined by a giant of a man, who turned out to be Phil Leinhart, Brewmaster of Ommegang Brewery http://www.ommegang.com/. While not the creater of Ommegang, he has put out wonderful beers since fully taking over production in 2008. Also polite, he briefly got in on the Red Ale discussion. I bid them both farewell and returned to the patiently-waiting Madison. It as truly an excellent experience.
The highlight of the beer experience, however, was the following day. With my friend Leentje in tow, I ventured back to Rattle 'N' Hum for a second day of beers before I departed to New York City. Recognizing me from the prior night, Patrick directed me over to Eric VanZile, sales rep of Ithaca Beer Company http://www.ithacabeer.com/, who then proceeded to say hello and bring me over to Jeff O'Neil, executive brewer for Ithica. Immediately friendly and welcoming, they told me about Ithaca distribution in Connecticut and Massachusetts, and their desire to expand. Eventually, we delved into a talk about his Cascazilla Red Ale, a hop-monster with some of the most unusual characteristics you'll find in an East Coast beer.
Taking a stance about cloning beers directly opposite to that of Rob Todd, Jeff happily explained the recipe to Cascazilla and encouraged me to email him for a detailed breakdown of the ingredient ratios and mash times (I gotta get on that) for his recipe. While I'm grateful to have met Rob and Phil, I especially impressed with the passion that Jeff and Eric had for their beer. Beyond a friendliness that is necessary for good product marketing, there was an unwavering enthusiasm in both of them that seemed so genuine and real. After a few more minutes talking about growing hops, I let them be, but in the fifteen or so minutes they spoke to Leentje and I, they gained a customer for life and a recommendation to try their beers at the earliest available opportunity.
Once again, thank you Jeff and Eric.
I spent the past weekend in New York City, and while I could take pages describing the museums, the copious amount of food, the amazing fashion, or y time with friends, I really just want to get out some advertising for some incredible bars and brewers.
Sepember 11th-20th marks Craft Beer Week in NYC, with hundreds of different craft brews being sold at 82 bars across the city in 4 boroughs. Some of the top beer bars in the city, including House of Brews on West 51st street and Blind Tiger down in the Greenwich Villiage area (home to the best grilled cheese I have ever tasted).
The highlight of the experience, however, was Rattle 'N' Hum Bar http://www.rattlenhumbarnyc.com/ on East 33rd Street in Manhattan. Hosting "Brewers Nights" for 9 straight nights, I was fortunate enough to be there both Friday and Saturday before I left, getting to meet the brewmasters from Ommegang, Allagash, and Ithica breweries.
Before I heap praise onto one of those breweries specifically, I must comment on the bar itself: A dark place, with a long old-fashioned bar with about 30 taps on the back wall. Crowded, with just a few tables, the remarkable part of the bar was its huge selection of cask beers. Uncarbonated, stored and aged at room temperature, and poured only through gravity, cask beers tend to come few and far between at most bars. A good beer bar will have 3 or 4 cask selections. Due to beer week, however, there were close to 30 casks, ranging from belgian pale ales, sour beers, to a remarkable Stone Smoked Porter with Vanilla.
After arriving on Friday with Madison and sampling some of the casks (as well as the Obammegang brew from Ommegang), my excitement turned to the arrival of the brewers. Hearing me ask about their whereabouts to a waitress, Patrick, slightly-brogued owner of the bar, introduced himself and asked me to follow him. I was quickly whisked away and introduced to Rob Todd, brewmaster of Allagash Brewing Company http://www.allagash.com/ in Maine. The ensuing conversation consisted mostly of his experiences with BeerSchool.com, the value of preserving recipe secrets, and the potential for a Flanders Red Ale or other sour beer in the collection.
Immediately after, we were joined by a giant of a man, who turned out to be Phil Leinhart, Brewmaster of Ommegang Brewery http://www.ommegang.com/. While not the creater of Ommegang, he has put out wonderful beers since fully taking over production in 2008. Also polite, he briefly got in on the Red Ale discussion. I bid them both farewell and returned to the patiently-waiting Madison. It as truly an excellent experience.
The highlight of the beer experience, however, was the following day. With my friend Leentje in tow, I ventured back to Rattle 'N' Hum for a second day of beers before I departed to New York City. Recognizing me from the prior night, Patrick directed me over to Eric VanZile, sales rep of Ithaca Beer Company http://www.ithacabeer.com/, who then proceeded to say hello and bring me over to Jeff O'Neil, executive brewer for Ithica. Immediately friendly and welcoming, they told me about Ithaca distribution in Connecticut and Massachusetts, and their desire to expand. Eventually, we delved into a talk about his Cascazilla Red Ale, a hop-monster with some of the most unusual characteristics you'll find in an East Coast beer.
(Some of Ithica's brews, including Cascazilla, the Red Ale with IPA bite)
Taking a stance about cloning beers directly opposite to that of Rob Todd, Jeff happily explained the recipe to Cascazilla and encouraged me to email him for a detailed breakdown of the ingredient ratios and mash times (I gotta get on that) for his recipe. While I'm grateful to have met Rob and Phil, I especially impressed with the passion that Jeff and Eric had for their beer. Beyond a friendliness that is necessary for good product marketing, there was an unwavering enthusiasm in both of them that seemed so genuine and real. After a few more minutes talking about growing hops, I let them be, but in the fifteen or so minutes they spoke to Leentje and I, they gained a customer for life and a recommendation to try their beers at the earliest available opportunity.
Once again, thank you Jeff and Eric.
A list of beers sampled this weekend:
Radeberger Pilsner (Draft)
Thomas Hardy's Ale 2008 (Vintage Bottle)
Ommegang Cave Aged Abbey Ale 2007 (Cask)
Stone Smoked Porter with Vanilla Beans (Cask)
Ommegang (AKA Obammegang) Election Ale 2008 (Draft)
Ommegang (AKA Obammegang) Election Ale 2008 (Draft)
Allagash Four Quadruple (Draft)
Brooklyn Sirhachi Ale (Draft)
Brooklyn Blast! (Draft)
Elysian Dragonstooth Stout (Draft)
Elysian Elysian Trip II Golden Ale (Draft)
Jolly Pumpkin Weisen Bam (Cask)
Ommegang Hennepin Saison (Draft)
Ommegang Hennepin Saison (Draft)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Worth Its Salt
Just a quick writeup today, but I beg you to consider this question: What do you think is the most widely used grocery product in America? I don't have an answer for this, but if I could go door to door and look in every one's pantries, cupboards, refrigerators, freezers, or anywhere else food might be stored, I'd be willing to bet that one particular product is found in more homes than almost any other. I don't think it's Coca-Cola, Heinz Ketchup, Arm & Hammer Baking Soda, or even the timeless American classic, Wonder Bread. No, I believe it's this:

Morton Salt.
What? Salt?
Before about 150 years ago, to be "worth one's salt" meant that person was exceptionally valuable, just like salt, because of its extreme rarity. However with the discovery of processes to get salt from the earth, the price of salt dropped to where it is now one of the cheapest commodities in the world. Salt is now so cheap, in fact, that you rarely find that grocery stores and chains like Wal-Mart and Target even bother to produce generic versions. Even baking soda, flour, or sugar can claim that mark.
With this in mind, picture a container of salt. What does it look like? Probably the one above. Even as someone with experience in cooking, I had a difficult time thinking of more than 2 more brands of salt. Even my spendthrift former roomate who would almost never buy name brand anything had a container of Morton Salt in our cupboard before any of the other roomates moved in. It might have been the only name brand in the entire house (Even the ever-American Heinz Ketchup was not to be found).
Still not convinced? Think about this: Most people drink soda, but some prefer Pepsi, or Dr. Pepper, or even Tab if you're into that stuff. There are those people who don't drink it at all. Ketchup? Sure, every kid in America likes it, but there are those dirty rat bastards (oh hell, even this house), that will go with Hunts instead of Heinz, for reasons beyond me. Baking soda? Eh, generic brands are 1/2 the price. French's yellow mustard; not for those who prefer brown mustard! See what I'm saying? Even those companies with huge market shares have competition. Even in a house with a low-sodium diet such as mine has 3 different types of Morton Salt on hand.
What's the point of this post? Not much, really. Obviously Morton doesn't have the advertising power that Coke, Budweiser, Heinz, or any of the other big time brands does, but I challenge anyone to go to the grocery store and see what brands of salt are out there and I dare anyone to come back without telling me they saw a vast majority of the salt was Morton. Don't wanna take a trip to the store? Okay, go look now, I'd bet 90% of you will come back having seen that girl in the rain suit and umbrella.
Did you look? I'll wait...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Okay, I've waited long enough? Am I right? Thought so.
What's my point? I'm not sure, but to think about this: Morton Salt is as pervasive in the average American household as the moustached man of Orwell's 1984 reality. It really is a remarkable feat, in days of mass marketing, people buying glamorous brands, and nearly unlimited consumer protection. Perhaps Mr. Morton really is worth his own weight. But of course, you'll have to take this whole post with a grain of salt.

Morton Salt.
What? Salt?
Before about 150 years ago, to be "worth one's salt" meant that person was exceptionally valuable, just like salt, because of its extreme rarity. However with the discovery of processes to get salt from the earth, the price of salt dropped to where it is now one of the cheapest commodities in the world. Salt is now so cheap, in fact, that you rarely find that grocery stores and chains like Wal-Mart and Target even bother to produce generic versions. Even baking soda, flour, or sugar can claim that mark.
With this in mind, picture a container of salt. What does it look like? Probably the one above. Even as someone with experience in cooking, I had a difficult time thinking of more than 2 more brands of salt. Even my spendthrift former roomate who would almost never buy name brand anything had a container of Morton Salt in our cupboard before any of the other roomates moved in. It might have been the only name brand in the entire house (Even the ever-American Heinz Ketchup was not to be found).
Still not convinced? Think about this: Most people drink soda, but some prefer Pepsi, or Dr. Pepper, or even Tab if you're into that stuff. There are those people who don't drink it at all. Ketchup? Sure, every kid in America likes it, but there are those dirty rat bastards (oh hell, even this house), that will go with Hunts instead of Heinz, for reasons beyond me. Baking soda? Eh, generic brands are 1/2 the price. French's yellow mustard; not for those who prefer brown mustard! See what I'm saying? Even those companies with huge market shares have competition. Even in a house with a low-sodium diet such as mine has 3 different types of Morton Salt on hand.
What's the point of this post? Not much, really. Obviously Morton doesn't have the advertising power that Coke, Budweiser, Heinz, or any of the other big time brands does, but I challenge anyone to go to the grocery store and see what brands of salt are out there and I dare anyone to come back without telling me they saw a vast majority of the salt was Morton. Don't wanna take a trip to the store? Okay, go look now, I'd bet 90% of you will come back having seen that girl in the rain suit and umbrella.
Did you look? I'll wait...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Okay, I've waited long enough? Am I right? Thought so.
What's my point? I'm not sure, but to think about this: Morton Salt is as pervasive in the average American household as the moustached man of Orwell's 1984 reality. It really is a remarkable feat, in days of mass marketing, people buying glamorous brands, and nearly unlimited consumer protection. Perhaps Mr. Morton really is worth his own weight. But of course, you'll have to take this whole post with a grain of salt.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Author vs. Four-Year-Old
Every great man, every great following, and every great idea have had their shares of rivals, to which their greatness can be compared: Cesar had Mark; Antony Jesus had Satan; Judaism had Islam; Catholicism had Logic. Today the author looks to define his greatness in a face to face comparison of one of the greatest threats to his supremacy: A Four-Year-Old Boy.
Today, the blog will take a side by side look at the achievements of the author and his rival, judging their respective pre-eminence in a variety of areas.
Matchup 1: Artistic Expression.
Subject: Rabbit
Artifact 1: Burberry, as drawn by the four-year-old. Media: Marker, Paper




Examining the Author's construct, one clearly sees a fuselage, aerodynamic nosecones, wings, and a functioning rudder. Not only would this aircraft fly, its blue missiles present a clear threat to enemy Legos, Tycos, and MegaBlocks the entire world over. F****N MISSLES! HOW BADASS IS THAT?! Quite obviously, this is an example of aerospace mastery of the most epic proportions.
Winner: Author (2-0)
Matchup 3: Care for Animals
Subject: Fluff and Sunshine, 4-week-Old Kittens.
Artifact 5: Photograph of four-year-old with Fluff the Kitten.
Notice immediately that despite the subject’s moustache, top hat, and evil bandit mask, the kitten clearly is uninterested in being held. Also note the awkward manner of holding the young feline, potentially placing the animal at risk.
Artifact 6: Photograph of kittens Fluff and Sunshine on chest of Author.

Today, the blog will take a side by side look at the achievements of the author and his rival, judging their respective pre-eminence in a variety of areas.
Matchup 1: Artistic Expression.
Subject: Rabbit
Artifact 1: Burberry, as drawn by the four-year-old. Media: Marker, Paper

Note the rudimentary lines, monochromatic color scheme, and lack of significant detail. While the ears are properly proportioned to the eyes, no rabbit has a nose like that, and the whiskers are clearly too thick. Lastly, everyone knows, of course, that rabbits cannot smile like that, especially without the presence of carrots and alfalfa!
Artifact 2: Burberry, as drawn by Author. Media: Oil Pastels, Paper
Artifact 2: Burberry, as drawn by Author. Media: Oil Pastels, Paper

In contrast, notice the author’s attention to detail, the soft texture of the fur the lifelike eyes, and the soft blending of colors.
Winner: Author (1-0)
Matchup 2: Lego Building
Subject: Lego Airplanes
Artifact 3: Plane as created by four-year-old
Winner: Author (1-0)
Matchup 2: Lego Building
Subject: Lego Airplanes
Artifact 3: Plane as created by four-year-old

Looking at the four-year-old’s plane, it is difficult to distinguish any real shape. Lacking wings, a fuselage, and tail, this clearly would not take flight. While the effort of placing a propeller on the hastily built craft is noted, who in the name of Mr. Peanut puts a fucking propeller on the back of a non-flying plane?!
Artifact 4: Plane, as created by Author.
Artifact 4: Plane, as created by Author.

Examining the Author's construct, one clearly sees a fuselage, aerodynamic nosecones, wings, and a functioning rudder. Not only would this aircraft fly, its blue missiles present a clear threat to enemy Legos, Tycos, and MegaBlocks the entire world over. F****N MISSLES! HOW BADASS IS THAT?! Quite obviously, this is an example of aerospace mastery of the most epic proportions.
Winner: Author (2-0)
Matchup 3: Care for Animals
Subject: Fluff and Sunshine, 4-week-Old Kittens.
Artifact 5: Photograph of four-year-old with Fluff the Kitten.
Notice immediately that despite the subject’s moustache, top hat, and evil bandit mask, the kitten clearly is uninterested in being held. Also note the awkward manner of holding the young feline, potentially placing the animal at risk.
Artifact 6: Photograph of kittens Fluff and Sunshine on chest of Author.

Looking at the crooked and stained smile of Author, as well as the playful demeanor of the subject felines upon Author’s chest, one can see the relaxed atmosphere in the kitten’s domicile. Propped gently upon the ever-expanding stomach of the esteemed author, the kittens are carefree and so comfortable that they are willing to urinate on author without command (photo not shown). Clearly, Author’s ability to relate to animals is as masterful as his dexterity with Lego bricks.
Winner: Author (3-0)
Matchup 4: Creative Writing
Subject: Personal Statements from respective opponents
Artifact 7: Personal statement of four-year-old.
[None. Four-year-old’s cannot write clearly, type, nor express their thoughts in a coherent enough manner to take part in contest. When asked to give an oral reply, four-year-old commented “Kitties peed on Bryan. Sunshine is in box. Dora is on TV now.”]
Artifact 8: Personal statement by Author.
“F**K YEAH! CAN’T DO S**T, LITTLE TYKE. GO WATCH DORA, P***Y!”
Winner: Author (4-0)
Results: Author 4, Toddler 0
The winner is clear. The author has successfully claimed supremacy over his opponent, like gravity over D.B. Cooper. Tune in next week for Week 2, when our Author challenges an 11-year old-paraplegic and her helper goat.
*Lets remember, this is satire, folks.
Winner: Author (3-0)
Matchup 4: Creative Writing
Subject: Personal Statements from respective opponents
Artifact 7: Personal statement of four-year-old.
[None. Four-year-old’s cannot write clearly, type, nor express their thoughts in a coherent enough manner to take part in contest. When asked to give an oral reply, four-year-old commented “Kitties peed on Bryan. Sunshine is in box. Dora is on TV now.”]
Artifact 8: Personal statement by Author.
“F**K YEAH! CAN’T DO S**T, LITTLE TYKE. GO WATCH DORA, P***Y!”
Winner: Author (4-0)
Results: Author 4, Toddler 0
The winner is clear. The author has successfully claimed supremacy over his opponent, like gravity over D.B. Cooper. Tune in next week for Week 2, when our Author challenges an 11-year old-paraplegic and her helper goat.
*Lets remember, this is satire, folks.
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